Many women now face the problem of alcoholism in the family. "Husband drinks every day, what should I do? ", "Husband drinks for 10 days, how to behave? " - these questions have been heard more and more lately. Of course, the spouse is an alcoholic - it's scary. And drunken alcoholism, if left untreated, is generally capable of turning life into eternal torment. But here you must always keep in mind that alcoholism is a disease, not a personal choice of a certain person. A sick person undoubtedly needs the support of those closest to him, especially when he cannot cope with the problem on his own. But, as a rule, when the husband drinks, the wife suffers first. And in such moments, the question is often asked: what to do when the husband got drunk? There are several ways out of this situation: leave him and get a divorce or try to fight for your life and help your loved one. Although we can say with certainty that this fight will not be easy. But the decision here must be made by the woman herself, no advice from a psychologist will help. Only she can decide for herself what she wants and what she can do to achieve her goal.
Tough decision
Divorce is the simplest and easiest solution. Thus the woman seems to absolve herself of responsibility for the future destiny of the man. But in this case, you should adhere to a certain behavior. The main thing here: if you decide to leave, go. Regardless of the persuasion or request, it is important to know that the promises of alcoholics cannot be trusted. He will do anything to convince his wife: burst into tears, give gifts, fall to her knees. If he fails to do so, he may resort to violence or blackmail. Therefore, you should not follow in his footsteps, because once you believe in this, you can cause a repetition of such concerts. And they can last for more than a week or even more than a month. The advice of a psychologist in this case is unequivocal: you must make a firm decision, convey it clearly to your husband, do not believe the promises and do not give in to pity. We must always keep in mind that no matter how bad a husband is, a wife will be twice as bad.
If the choice is made in the direction of fighting and helping the closest person, then the woman will have to be patient. The most important thing in this case is to understand why the husband started drinking and then go deeper into solving this problem. Today, there are many ways to get rid of alcohol.
First of all, you need to learn how to behave properly. If your spouse has started drinking more often and occasionally gets drunk, you can try to change your tactics. After all, he is sure that, upon arriving home, he will run into another scandal with tears and breaking dishes. Or will he be greeted by deathly silence and icy contempt? In any case, you must try to change: to become kinder, to surround him with attention and care, to try to open up to him other joys of life, in addition to drinking alcohol. Often this behavior confuses men and then it is much easier to deal with them. At the very least, you will protect yourself and your children from unwarranted aggression and save your nerves.
Second, you must try to protect the faithful from his drinking friends. Indeed, most often a man drinks vodka for company, or out of loneliness. When intoxicated, men have very low self-esteem. It seems to them that no one needs them anymore and they are not suitable for anything. Try to prove how wrong you are:
- to show that he is the head of the family, its hope and support, and that without his participation everything can collapse;
- focus your attention on children who find it mentally difficult to live with a drinking father;
- to occupy him with new interests and hobbies.
Codependence
It may be that the wife is unable to leave her alcoholic husband. There can be many reasons for this, but she still has to figure out how to live.
There is something like interdependence, when a woman, willy-nilly, falls into social or physical dependence on her husband, trying to pull him out of the hole and return him to the family. This usually happens when a woman has a strong emotional attachment to her partner. Only an experienced psychologist can help here.
There are clear signs that the presence of codependence can be judged:
- the wife takes responsibility for the health, mood and well-being of her husband;
- she tries to please her husband by doing all the work for him;
- feels the need to help her husband with problems, mostly to solve problems for him;
- justifies spousal misconduct in front of others;
- she feels guilty about what happened to her husband;
- closes his eyes to the problem, believing that all that is not done is for the better;
- falls into the same addiction to alcohol, has no strength to resist;
- considers himself a sacrifice that pays for past sins;
- physically or emotionally attached to the spouse.
What to do to a woman when her husband gets drunk
There are many reasons why men drink for a long time. Here are the main ones:
- they do not want to resist addictions;
- family conflicts;
- inability to cope with stress.
Everyone knows that alcohol causes a feeling of euphoria, which develops a person with one of the strongest addictions that he may not have the desire to overcome. Weak mentality and willpower can also be one of the reasons for getting drunk. And if the stressful situation at home or at work is long-lasting, then a person can drink almost every day.
Denial of alcoholism is a problem for all alcoholics. You can constantly hear various excuses, such as: "Yes, I'm an alcoholic, and I like it! " Or "I don't drink for no reason. " A drinker never admits that he is addicted, it seems to him that he can stop drinking whenever he wants. But in fact, it all ends with another drunkenness, after which he begins to convince himself and everyone around him of the strength of character.
What to do in such a situation is not difficult to understand - to treat unequivocally. But what a woman should definitely not do is worth understanding. Not worth it:
- look for excuses for his heavy drinking;
- hide the problem, clothe it with a needle, trying to show that it is not what it is;
- to justify the husband to colleagues or bosses for not working or being systematically late;
- drink with your spouse to get less;
- give drinks at home, until he drinks on the street;
- to wash and clean up the consequences of alcohol poisoning;
- buy alcohol;
- blackmail of sexual relations;
- threatens divorce;
- treat her husband secretly from him.
There are various ways that can help a person get out of a state of intoxication:
- drug solution;
- folk remedies;
- psychological assistance and rehabilitation program;
- prayer or conspiracy against alcoholism.
Light drunkenness
With such an initial stage of alcohol addiction, you can try to get rid of folk methods to get rid of overeating. It is also good that the treatment can be reported at home. The first thing to do is let the patient sleep and then rest him in bed. It is recommended to consume plenty of fluids in order to establish a balance of water and salt in the body. In this case, various fruit drinks, herbal infusions and decoctions are suitable. You can also take a contrast shower, herbal baths, massages and other procedures aimed at improving and restoring the body. It is not worth resorting to medical intervention without consulting a specialist, otherwise you can cause unforeseen complications.
Plenty to drink
When drunkenness lasts longer than three days, you will most likely need the help of a narcologist. A specialist can be called at home. He will properly assess the patient's condition and prescribe medication to be taken, carefully following the doctor's instructions.
Most often, to alleviate the symptoms of withdrawal, the doctor puts an intravenous drop at home, which helps cleanse the blood of alcohol toxins and ethanol breakdown products. It also often contains regenerative ingredients and sedatives. The fact is that the person who drinks very often becomes aggressive, panics or experiences inexplicable fears.
In order to calm him down and restore his nervous system after getting drunk, the doctor can consult classes with a psychologist and prescribe psychotropic medications.
Heavy booze
Usually heavy drinking lasts a week or more. If the situation is practically out of control, or the person who drinks has a history of chronic diseases, in this case, only hospitalization of the patient in a narcology or toxicology clinic can help. Hospital treatment will help prevent the possible unpleasant consequences of severe overeating, which can manifest itself in the form of "delirium tremens" or alcoholic psychosis. In such a state, the patient is not able to control himself and can perform aggressive actions directed towards any family member who is in a disturbed state. Of course, it is advisable not to get into it, but if the withdrawal syndrome suddenly becomes very severe, treatment with herbs or prayers is necessary. You must go to a drug treatment hospital as soon as possible, otherwise you can cause serious damage to your health, including death.
conclusions
When the husband is an alcoholic - it is a terrible sadness for people close to him. They care and suffer, even more than the patient himself. Sometimes life becomes so unbearable that you have to make a choice: save your family or your health. Rarely can a woman end a once happy family life, especially if she has children who still love their dad. All she has left is to get her loved one out of this terrible trap. However, it is very difficult to do it yourself, and in fact it is not necessary. In this case, you can not do without psychological help and support. The advice of an experienced expert will tell you how to behave properly and what to do to get your husband out of intoxication and return him to a normal life. All you have to do is have a lot of patience and don't despair, because despair can lead to reckless actions, which you can sincerely regret.